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Dr Gabor Maté | Don’t Ignore Your Own Needs (Part 3)

How To Academy Mindset
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We tend to believe that normality equals health. Yet what is the norm in the Western world? Joining us live on stage in London - in conversation with filmmaker and author David Malone - the renowned physician, addiction expert and author Gabor Maté dissects the underlying causes of this malaise - physical and emotional, and connects the dots between our personal suffering and the pressures of modern-day living.
Illness and trauma are defining how we live. 45% of Europeans suffer high blood pressure, and nearly 70% of Americans take at least one prescription drug.
Over four decades of clinical experience, Dr Gabor Maté has found that the common definition of ‘normal’ is false: virtually all disease is actually a natural reflection of life in an abnormal culture, as we grow further and further apart from our true selves.
Filled with stories of people in the grip of illness or in the triumphant wake of recovery, this life-affirming talk from the beloved physician and author will show how true health is possible - if we are willing to embrace authenticity above social expectations.
Gabor Maté is a retired physician, bestselling author and renowned speaker, highly sought after for his expertise on addiction, trauma, stress and childhood development. He has written four bestselling books published in nearly thirty languages, including the award-winning In the Realm of Hungry Ghosts: Close Encounters with Addiction. He has been awarded the Order of Canada (his country’s equivalent of the MBE) and the Civic Merit Award from his hometown, Vancouver, for his ground-breaking medical work and writing.
David Malone is a filmmaker and TV presenter whose documentaries include Testing God, Soul Searching (both Channel 4), Dangerous Knowledge and The Secret Life of Waves (both BBC). He is the author of The Debt Generation.

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21 Mar 2023

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YORUMLAR 295
L'illumination
L'illumination 3 aylar önce
I got so sucked into the needs of my parents, society pressure to be formatted, then husband, kids, career so-to-speak... that after leaving the abusive spouse, I was so estranged from myself that it took me 2 years to start shopping food for my own needs, for example. For I lost myself in that abyss of being a mother Teresa.
Tom Deane
Tom Deane 5 gün önce
That last sentence is so powerful. A library of books could be written about it
Cailin Webb
Cailin Webb 8 gün önce
@Ruby Tuesday That's a great place to be to reframe everything. I'm in a similar place myself . I'm a healer so I understand how things are stored in our cells and sometime it take something huge to change things . People you used to mix with are on z different vibration so you cant gel with them anymore. That means you're making progress. Lots of love n hugs 🙏💜💜💜
bina nocht
bina nocht 23 gün önce
@Malibu Dolphin appreicate your comment but you have the wrong end of the stick. My mother had a bad fall and her house was in such a state that she wasnt going to be able to manage to get physucally around the house. There were also mice infesting it. It had to be done. Nobody else was going to do it. And i would not see my mother in such a state. She may not have wanted to throw out her old jars and plastic bags but it had to be done. My aunts house had rotting wood windows rotting and falling dangerously from their walls. Dry rot hadd set in from hoarder old furniture piled up along with floor boards collasping. She is in her 80s. There was also nobody else to help her so that also needed to be done before the ceiling fell in or a window or she had a fall. She also had no kitchen and needed go be able to eat cook safely. In order to do the kitchen which was my initial task rotting old furniture had to be removed. On doing that we found rotting floors and walls and windows which then had to be fixed replaced etc. Then we also found lead pipes suppsed to have been removed which meant we had to have plumbing done which was done badly which caused a wall to collapse to that had to be fixed. Then covid hit and nobody was working so i had to do a lot myself and then after covid everyone was booked up so the rest had go be done by me as well. There was nobody else to do it and i would not leave my elderly aunt in such a situation but she also didnt want to move away from frineds and family where she had lived her whole life. So everything is pretty much safe and secure now and she has a kitchen which means she can cook healthy food or have a person in to clean once a week whcih she could not have had before. I am a full time stay at home mother and i spend every other hour of my life dedicated to my children. But when something needed to be done ( and holidays were not a nessesitiy but a luxury) they went to the seaside with my aunt and mother so i could work. They had nice times with their family ..i just wasnt there for those fun days. I am there every other day of the year with my kids. That we didnt have the luxuries of holidays is a regret i have but not one my kids have. They dont really like the beach. But in my mind i feel guilty. But at the end of the day it was not a priority and the safety of my elderly family was. And so i do have an acute sense of priority. And an acute sense of duty to my family. Not only to my chidlren but to my aunt and mother who raised me and for whom i am grateful and would not neglect caring for. I have a sense of boundaries as well and i sense that you have crossed a very basic boundary of making assumptions and judgements on a complete stranger and actually critising somone so horribly in such an intimate subject as their parenting skills their family etc. Thats absolutely way over the boundary. Anyway maybe in future you can keep your projections to yourself if you have the capacity to learn that is..god knows plenty of people just enjoy flinging shit at strangers for their own gratification. Hopefully you are not one of those people but if youre not then perhaps have a little think before you go for the throat eh? Youre not spreading anything pleasant with your comment.
Malibu Dolphin
Malibu Dolphin 23 gün önce
@bina nocht wow you have no boundaries, no sense of priorities. You seem to avoid your duty as a parent to your children by preoccupation with your parents who doesn't sound like the want your 'help'. If you missed a family life with your parents growing up, well that part of your life is over, don't rob your kids of their family because you are obsessed with creating something with your parents that they aren't interested in.
Nama Slay
Nama Slay 18 gün önce
Our families sometimes are the cause of most our sufferings and we .. never blame them . We are wiser.. we are more compassionate and we suffer . I’m so grateful for having meditation .. yoga .. the intellect to see exactly what I need to do , for my adult peace . Generation breakers have the toughest times but we can prevail if we change our minds ! It’s never to late to be better , to keep trying and to want more !
Maya Love
Maya Love 10 gün önce
Yes I’m the generational breaker, healing many generations of martyrdom and being responsible for self not others……
Teejhae_0128
Teejhae_0128 11 gün önce
😢😢😢
Chad Michael
Chad Michael 4 aylar önce
My Rheumatoid Arthritis (which I was diagnosed with at 30) was the cure. It was my body metaphorically trying to tell me something. I am 32 and off all medications. I sometimes take a low dose of prednisone every once in awhile but I don’t make a big deal anymore about a minor flare up. I just think, “what stresses did I let into my life without standing up for my own needs” and I move on. I’m getting better at that everyday with practice. My rheumatologist is perplexed and annoyed by me. You’d think he’d be happy for me. Same with my primary care physician.
Amy Rebecca Perez
Amy Rebecca Perez 15 gün önce
So glad you are getting healthy and figuring out how to attune to what your body needs.
Khurty Ramudu
Khurty Ramudu 28 gün önce
@Question Everything Fascinating explanation! I’m curious as to how you would explain Covid by this same logic. And why did some die and others not?
bina nocht
bina nocht Aylar önce
Jesus. Lalck of support from medical people is incredibly stressful. I hope you find somone supportive. But i also know thats rare. I get bizzare pains and my muscles lock up and go weird and sore and i never considered stress as a part of that. I seem to do nothing at times but stress about all the things i have to do that are ovwerwhelming. They have to be done so ive no choice but to try to muster psotivity so i can do them. But often i just get sucked under by it all and cant muster the positivity. Especially when others arent trying at all to boost me up. Which seems mean when i try to get under everything they do and give them a boost.
Clara Bell
Clara Bell 2 aylar önce
@Michael Mckinney I love your reply to this post, you are so very, very right 🙏💜
Michael Mckinney
Michael Mckinney 2 aylar önce
@Chad Michael You're right to be concerned about joint health because once that template of connective tissue is worn away it won't come back. It can be added to but never from zero. Protect it at all cost. There are many things that can help.
Cherabreena
Cherabreena 23 gün önce
I find this to be absolutely true. I spent the majority of my life being a people pleaser and my health suffered greatly. It wasn’t until I entered my thirties and finally learned to set boundaries and leave every toxic relation behind, that my health started flourishing. Especially after leaving my last relationship of 4+ years where I’d started suffering from anxiety after being traumatized by the person’s actions. My blood pressure was high despite eating super healthy. Sleep was terrible. Crying at night. My face broke out constantly. Migraines started becoming frequent (never suffered from that before) sudden ear/hearing problems that no doctors could explain. My period went haywire. Lots of physical symptoms. A month after I left and went no contact with this person all of those symptoms disappeared. ALL OF THEM! AFTER 1 MONTH!! That’s when I learned the true meaning of the word ‘toxic’ when it comes to human interactions. Choose your company CAREFULLY!!
I Can Let Go - Recovery From Hoarding
WORD. I am dealing with hoarding issues. I no longer say, "I have hoarding disorder" because I don't want to give "it" that power over me. I also no longer hate myself for the hoarding issues. They are a coping mechanism that enabled me to survive childhood trauma. And now my Inner Adult is working on helping my Inner Child heal 🙏😌💕✨
Paula Warren
Paula Warren 26 gün önce
I really appreciate your comments and your openness. I think you're absolutely amazing for the statement that you said that you will not hate yourself anymore. That's absolutely spectacular progress. Much love and joy as we all move into the greater versions of ourselves.
Rosemary Allen
Rosemary Allen Aylar önce
@Fabulous Hoarding is a substitute for being in control. It can be obsessive collecting of wonderful things, or just keeping absolute rubbish, but the stuff is not the true problem. If the life problem is addressed, the need to hoard diminishes.
Heidi East
Heidi East 2 aylar önce
From what you've said, I've felt the same.
I Can Let Go - Recovery From Hoarding
@Fire Horse Thank you so much. I'm really glad to hear you've been able to find the root cause of your behavior and are taking good care of yourself ✨ I'm working to do the same & also hope to help shift public perception of this behavior.
Rachel's Space Yoga, breath, sound & meditation.
Gabor is soo on point. My mother has MS and I observed she had no self esteem and put other people needs before herself. I repeated the cycle which was also wrapped in child trauma of needed to tend my parents needs to keep myself safe. My nervous system was soo deregulated I spent years in fight mode then to freeze and collapse. I have many symptoms that align with an auto immune disease. It’s a minute by minute process to put myself and my needs first. I’m reformed people pleaser and in a way the symptoms that I experience are a gift and stop me from doing to much and not living from an authentic place. I have found yoga particularly restorative , meditation, IFS, reiki, sound healing vagus nerve activation, compassion practices, talk therapy, somatic experiencing, building community connection with other women that is heart based. I know it possible to heal and I am soo grateful to Gabor for he’s incredible work.
Robyn Belle Horton
Robyn Belle Horton 3 aylar önce
❤️
Jas Bataille
Jas Bataille 19 gün önce
I'm a child cancer survivor, I was 8 years old and the tumour was supposed to take 20 years to grow. I'm also autistic - interestingly enough, autistic people tend not to say that they "have" autism, rather than it's an inextricable part of us! I didn't thought about my other diseases that way before now. I was bullied and micro-managed all my childhood and in early adulthood as well. My parents are the "nice guys" and I come from a family of people exactly like you describes. Despite my mom being into natural remedies and alternative medicine quite heavily, she keeps on radically denying any connection between body and mind and refuses to look into any implication of her actions and that of my dad on me as a child. It's been now many years and I'm tired, I've been living with chronic pain numerous conditions. The last one of them is asthma from unknown causes, I stopped breathing and I would've been dead if I was alone at home like most time. After this much time I feel like I finally have a proper answer. Thank you so much Dr!
Maya Love
Maya Love 10 gün önce
This was so me and I developed severe chronic fatigue and CPTSD because I wasn’t looking at it, my body basically shut down, it’s been a 9 year journey slowly healing the suffering I’ve held for others and slowly trying to believe I deserve to look after myself on all levels. It’s still difficult.
Cathi Hargaden
Cathi Hargaden Aylar önce
This guy is great- I’m health professional and been in thousands of homes one day I said there’s a pattern to people with certain conditions and their root was emotional- I also had a child disease I write about it like Gabor but people resist making the connection his truths expressed r wide and far reaching ❤
Get Help
Get Help 20 gün önce
Isn't German New Medicine about this sort of concept?
Shenan Klinger-Fenech
Shenan Klinger-Fenech 3 aylar önce
Thank you Dr. Mate for helping me understand that taking care of my own needs is not just something I ought to try out or some new age trend. It is my biggest duty and highest priority to take care of my own needs in order to stay healthy, well balanced and able to care for others in a better way.
Stephanie Luckey
Stephanie Luckey 2 aylar önce
100%!!! If we don’t care for ourselves our loved ones will end up caring the weight!!! Only when we stand up strong can we be someone’s shoulder to lean on.
Chelsea Peterson
Chelsea Peterson 3 aylar önce
Needed to hear it’s healthy to have that boundary with anger sometimes. Thank you. Was feeling guilty about exercising a healthy boundary and then it was violated so this message is medication. Healing.
yvonne shanson
yvonne shanson 3 aylar önce
@Chelsea Peterson happy i coiuld help a fellow survivor 😊! ..our inner child deserves her emotions to be honored to the fullest.. wishing u the best 💚
Chelsea Peterson
Chelsea Peterson 3 aylar önce
@yvonne shanson thank you. Never considered it before - mind opening.
yvonne shanson
yvonne shanson 3 aylar önce
Set a program where you congratulate yourself for even a small amount of anger and externalization of indignation or discomfort in any given situation, esp in front of others. Imagine yourself as a child that needs this exact reaffirmation.. do it for as long as it takes to heal yourself 🩵😊
Life’s lessons
Life’s lessons 3 aylar önce
I adhere and gravitate to this genius… he talks such wisdom and logic. I’ve had stress in my adult life from 31- 60 . I’m left with high cholesterol, gum Disease and type two diabetes… I’m actively working on repairing myself with diabetes meds . I’m not surprised of my health issues… as a child I was constantly trying to gain love and respect..as an adult I craved love and took the wrong choices . I was widowed and pregnant at age 35 ..my entire life has been a struggle..independently.
Anna Jones
Anna Jones Aylar önce
Perhaps all your health issues are due to high cortisol or cortisol resistance. I've been learning about this recently... From abusive childhood I went from one to another to another abusive relationship not knowing any better. Focusing on being the best wife, mother, daughter, friend, I didn't have a clue what my needs have been. I'm 47 and I'm learning this now. I feel like a kid, but I suppose it's never too late! ;) All my life I felt alone and in highly stressed state. Where it got me now are these two components, to bring back my cortisol to normal level (there are good videos out there on affects of chronic stress and high cortisol linked to soo many health problems) and learning about myself and taking care of my Self the way we were meant to. ❤
ekenechristy ike
ekenechristy ike 3 aylar önce
God will stand by you and send Yelp your way IJN Amen. You are here today after all the stressful journey you've been through, you will come out on top after all said and done. I feel same too. But I try to take a day at a time...not bothering about tomorrow cos it usually stresses me the more. I'm getting better praise God 🙏
@PrettyPink🌸
@PrettyPink🌸 13 gün önce
Dr. Gabor Mate is a real gift❤️
Tanya Davies
Tanya Davies 2 aylar önce
So glad Maté is getting his truly proper due. Started watching him 4 years ago in the midst of a family member's cancer journey. As an observer, I saw exactly what he was saying.😔😔😔😔
Mohammed F. Al-Ghamdi
Mohammed F. Al-Ghamdi 2 aylar önce
There is a fine line between needs and desires. Our minds should be able to detect the differences.
nerudaad
nerudaad 4 aylar önce
I hope his message is heard by as many as possible
Tim Hardman
Tim Hardman 3 aylar önce
Anger is a boundary defense. YES. It is healthy when acting as a protection system against being invaded. THANKS. What a nice way of putting it. Great. 👍🏻😉🚀
J Andrews
J Andrews 3 aylar önce
This realisation came to me after having flown in aircraft umpteen times and hearing the instruction to put on your own O2 mask before helping anyone else, even your child. Of course! If you don’t grab your mask and put it on, instead putting a mask on anyone else, you black out! And your usefulness ends right there. So, care for your own needs so that you be of use to others.
Piper Selinger
Piper Selinger 23 gün önce
This is all true. I was diagnosed with Hashimoto’s disease in my thirties. I am thankful because self care is now my number one priority. Our minds can convince us to keep moving forward in spite of everything but our bodies never lie to us. I grew up in a family dynamic that encouraged me to suppress my feelings and this continued into adulthood. I have no doubt this is the cause of my Hashimoto’s. I have done a lot of inner work and meditate every day. After a demanding career and having a family I can now step into part time work and take time for myself.
Heno heno
Heno heno 4 aylar önce
Legend Mr mate. This man needs to be heard..
Suzane Sugrue
Suzane Sugrue 3 aylar önce
Yes, yes and yes
Mary Brantly
Mary Brantly 3 aylar önce
I love Gabor! His work has changed my life. What an awakening! Thank you from my whole heart!
Maja Goedegebuur
Maja Goedegebuur 3 aylar önce
Yes my to,Its wunderful.! Amazing whats happend whit me when Ise this .
greentree730
greentree730 3 aylar önce
I had arthritis in both knees, elbows, fingers, and a toe. I knew as the dr was telling me what pills to take and how to keep moving through the pain. That I would Never live with this!!! I fasted and went to a healing room a month later, some strangers prayed for me in Jesus name. I had to forgive someone as well. I walked out 30 minutes later without arthritis and have never had it again. It was a decision I made in faith, I believed in miracles. It wasn't going to be diet thing, it was going to be a completely healed thing.
Mira Filipovic
Mira Filipovic 3 aylar önce
My dear colleague, you are a blessing; i have just discovered your videos and love the way you explain things so that even lay people can understand! Thank you for sharing your knowledge and expertise!
sassi
sassi 2 aylar önce
Exactly 💯 My breakdown, chronic fatigue syndrome and mental illnesses were virtually inevitable! I didn't stand a chance from conception! And yes I have now taken responsibility for myself because I finally recognised the problem... But it seems to be too late! I can't correct things anymore! 😭
Rosemary Allen
Rosemary Allen Aylar önce
It's never too late. A big set of problems takes a big effort and a lot of time to sort out, but the answer is always to take the smallest manageable steps at a time.
Saida
Saida 2 aylar önce
It’s so sad the fact that I’ve been like that unconsciously trying to please everybody not to lose connection, go out of my way to take care of others in the expense of my own, o thought that’s the only way I can be loved, after all autoimmune disorders, lots of health problems, loneliness-and friends and family doesn’t need you anymore, they got used to benefit from you and now not only they can’t benefit but also I’m in a state of need, emotional, physical, financial
Chaz
Chaz 2 aylar önce
I feel the same way completely ❤
Jo
Jo Aylar önce
Louise Hay talked about this in her book "You can heal your life" there is a section in the book with an alphabetical list of diseases and their metaphysical causes.
Cris T
Cris T 4 aylar önce
The human species has always baffled me, since I was old enough to perceive people’s thoughts and actions. Here is a man explaining to the world, finally, the mechanism of cancer in the human body, and there’s 22 comments.
Mister Robato
Mister Robato 21 gün önce
Forgive us, we're stupid.
Shereen Makhanye
Shereen Makhanye 3 aylar önce
The mind grapples with simple information, that’s why the human suffering.
Barbara Dellis
Barbara Dellis 20 gün önce
As a Reiki practitioner working with cancer patients, another common trait I notice is a "fixed" personality, inflexible, stubborn and balks at self-change to the point they wont regardless of outcome. Sad to watch knowing they can heal themselves with a (simple) change of mental state as Dr Mate explains here...something many people are unable to.
CNNSS FTE
CNNSS FTE 2 aylar önce
Dr Gabor is one of its kind🙌🏻🙌🏻 yet just thinking out loud ..if we have so many cancers (epidemics of it) but environment is toxic ..does one doesn't rule out the other?
Monique Lane
Monique Lane Aylar önce
In a way our environment is a reflection of our state of minds as humanity.. we now know the whole world is an interconnected ecosystem, this can be observed in biology, physics, chemistry and quantum physics.
jamlaw
jamlaw Aylar önce
This resonates with me. Also the conflicting message of being a saintly, giving person in society and not being selfish is hard for me to balance at times. (Not that I'm single by any means! Just the idea of being a Mother Teresa type, having compassion and love and giving to others ..)
Richard Hall
Richard Hall 4 aylar önce
The question at the start of this video was "..how does that happen!" With reference to people who are over helpful. I found that psychologist Dr Laurence Heller's NARM model answered this question for me in terms of survival strategies. This is a compassionate way of summarising behaviour patterns that's free from labelling and pathologizing and consequently judgements and stigma. So for example if you were disempowered through trauma as a child then giving your power away to make other people happy is a perfectly legitimate short term survival strategy. It can become a problem as you get older and are unaware that you can behave any differently. My understanding is that Gabor Mate's Compassionate Inquiry approach and NARM are essentially different versions of the same thing.
K Arnaud
K Arnaud 28 gün önce
​@Question EverythingI'm very sympathetic to your point but I think you will find some of the epidemiology of the spanish flu victims more complex than the gloss you have provided, and so people who are critical of your views may unfairly dismiss you generally because of this. As I understand it, the spanish flu affected and killed younger more robust people more quickly and more often than the rest, and it did so because it operated on parts of the body associated with better lung function. Just fyi as I was reading through, I'm happy to be corrected by more knowledgeable people
L3
L3 3 aylar önce
Excellent explanation, thank you.
Question Everything
Question Everything 3 aylar önce
Most of the more severe illnesses happen to people by an upsetting event happening in their lives that takes them by surprise, unexpectedly, impacting first in the brain, then in the corresponding organ which that part of the brain controls. The end of WWI had absolutely everything to do with the Flu and lung TB outbreak that occurred killing millions. In nature, the biological conflict linked with a territorial fear (just what it means-a fear in your territory, your home, your community, etc.) is a widening of the bronchia (tissue loss). Your body attempts to widen your bronchia in order to allow more air into your lungs to give you more strength and energy to fight to keep your territory safe. Stay with me.......The biological conflict linked with a death fright impacts the lungs. The lungs attempt to grow larger in order to allow more air in because breath equals life, as we all know. No breath equals death. Why are so many people across the world suddenly having their appendix removed? The appendix is associated with “being in fear for one’s life”. The HEALING phase is the rupture/inflammation. While you are in the fear or death fright conflict, you notice no symptoms of “disease”, except you have cold hands, cold feet, you can’t sleep, you awaken at 3 AM every night, you have little appetite. During the war, millions of people were in fear of the bombing of their homes and cities where the war was most active. Fearing for their lives, their loved ones in the war, their ability to survive. The food in the stores was sparse due to shortages. This lasted for 4 long years! The longer the conflict, the worse the healing phase. Within 2 weeks of the German Chancellor announcing the end of WWI, these millions of people ALL went into the healing phase all at the same time. It is during the healing phase that you experience symptoms of illness! What is the healing phase of the bronchia widening? Severe bronchitis, pneumonia. The body attempts to refill this lost tissue and you experience inflammation, fever, coughing, body aches, fatigue, etc. What is the healing phase of the extra lung tissue that grew? Decomposing of the tissue by TB bacteria and fungi. The symptoms of this healing phase are: severe coughing up of blood and tissue, fever, inflammation, severe mucous, body aches, fatigue. During this decomposing of the extra tissue (tumor), the body expels a lot of protein, and without replenishment, severe protein loss can result in death. Antibiotics did not exist yet. If TB bacteria does not exist in a person or they have been vaccinated against TB (big mistake), then the tumor will simply encapsulate and become dormant and not harm you. Who died during the Spanish Flu? Mainly the poor who could not afford to buy meat and proper nourishment, and the people who were directly impacted by the bombings and destruction of their homes. Millions of people suffered fear and death frights during the fighting of WWI, and millions of people all went into healing at the end of it. Not everyone was affected because not everyone suffered the same way. It’s not a “flu”, it’s not something you “catch”. It’s biological, meaningful, and unavoidable. One hundred years later, a Fear Campaign begins, using the media to spread it......
AV L
AV L 2 aylar önce
Thank you for this insightful and powerful video. Where can I find part 1 and part 2 please? Thank you 🙏
ELIZABETH D.
ELIZABETH D. 27 gün önce
When I’m being my authentic self people think I’m angry when I’m not just expressing my needs more
AquariusKay
AquariusKay 15 gün önce
This lecture is blowing my mind
Your Guide To Love
Your Guide To Love 3 aylar önce
Wow powerful video!! I’m definitely working on honoring my own needs first.
Joshua Black
Joshua Black 3 aylar önce
Great information! Thank you for this… 🙏🏽
Always Bekind
Always Bekind 2 aylar önce
Our whole purpose is to love others. And when we love ourselves we can do It that much better.
Nick
Nick 2 aylar önce
Human nature gets in the way.
simon winberg
simon winberg 3 aylar önce
This is my life If i dont heal myself next year it will be the end of me. Been severly depressed my whole adult life.
SpecialgiftsLA
SpecialgiftsLA 27 gün önce
Simonwinberg, this is a major turning point, at first each step you need to take will seem like a heavy feat..it will take abit of time at first but this is necessary for you to practise kmowing how to lead yourself to new True being of you which is healthy and stable, practise each morning and night talking lovingly and supportively to yourself when you are lying in bed and your body is supported and then have a few supportive phrases you feel help you. This will calm you. Trust the process and repeat a bit daily. Eventually the daily will become 3 times, or every 3hours or hour or every 15 minutes that you will sustain this new 'muscle'. Each small thing you incorporate 'as a habit,' or have different ones so if you don't do one you can pick from other ones, Focus on educating on healthy eating, applying it, walks to move and breathe and process thoughts constructively or just enjoy the feeling of it, sleep and hygien. You will see the changes and it will feel great. Now, only share your new found well being with anyone you can trust. No one else, and keep going. Sending you a hug. LA
Beelzeblub
Beelzeblub 2 aylar önce
I hope you find a way out, start small and build. Just listened to Jordan Peterson/John Delony podcast yesterday, it covered lots of different aspects of life, found it really interesting and positive so recommend. Wish you lots of luck and hope in your journey, don’t give up!
Lainey
Lainey 2 aylar önce
I understand that feeling. About 20 years ago that realization hit me when I was totally exhausted from trying to keep up with what I perceived everyone wanted of me. I wanted to curl up in a corner and just quit. It was a junction and I decided to try to dig my way out. I gradually started doing more positive things and setting some boundaries. It was hard but worth the journey. I have just recently read Dr. Mate’s books and what I have learned has given a deeper meaning to my journey. So, I encourage you not to give up. Baby steps - walks, healthy nutrition, daily steps forward in taking care of yourself make a difference. Please don’t give up. This could be your turning point❤️
living sensei
living sensei 3 aylar önce
check marisa peers videos on youtube
Hug 23
Hug 23 25 gün önce
dr. mate has the most soothing voice
Bambina 31
Bambina 31 16 gün önce
Doesn’t he though. I love to listen to him.
Rachel Kingsley
Rachel Kingsley 23 gün önce
The Bible command is to love others as we love ourselves! So we need to love ourselves before we can love other people - that how we know how to be loving.
HeartSpace Relaxations
We can also do the opposite which is narccistic, obsessed with self, self improvement, etc even if not in a grandiose way. Learning non aggressive assertiveness is important.
Tamela Shafer
Tamela Shafer 3 aylar önce
Exactly!!! Everything is energy…. Everything Thoughts, emotions, actions, sounds,…. Everything… Spell-Ing
louisa777ace
louisa777ace 2 aylar önce
I look at it like they use bad coping mechanics to deal with the emotions Deal with the needs be authentic Disease is I'll at ease with things What things I resolved the things I had in my life loved and love me Met my needs all things changed All things change if you look after yourself
iisa Bee
iisa Bee Aylar önce
This is great!
Myla Vila
Myla Vila 2 aylar önce
Change my emotional relationship to myself. I didn't even know I had PTSD. Until I was told. All the stuffing can cause stress, then autoimmune disease? It matters. Now, I must incorporate baby steps of a healthier life.
Mariana Salles
Mariana Salles 2 aylar önce
Amazing Dr Gabor💚✨🌎🌈🕊️🌱🙏🏻
Jason H.
Jason H. 2 aylar önce
It's a bit late to be talking about this subject, society is doomed to fail because greedy people have exploited those at the bottom far too much, for the last 20 years caring people have been expected to destroy themselves for the benefit of society.
julie clifford
julie clifford 3 aylar önce
People ‘get sick’- autoimmune diseases, cancer, MS.. and such.. pursuing attachment over authenticity.. and language is very important.. when you ignore your own needs. Chronically suppressing our own needs.. meeting the needs of others .. mind body emotional hormonal connection… healthy anger.. “my space get out .. protect your space” anger response prevents conflict.. boundary defense.. immune system.. emotional system both defends body.. “let in nurturing, keep out toxic” Cultural .. take on other people’s stresses… often women.. my notes: self care… and contribute to building healthy community.. to care after each other ✨Unity… interconnected.. to protect and help one another.. em a race authenticities and express emotions.. celebration and rituals.. work.. passion.. creativity.. outlets for energy.✨♥️
Timo E.
Timo E. 3 aylar önce
Holy moly!this must be one of the most insightful talks I've ever watched....oooor the most insightful at all
Donna
Donna 2 aylar önce
I naturally always put others before myself and I’ve got cancer !!
My Secret Life of Pain
Love to see the research though showing selfish people don’t get cancer and chronic pain/illness
Emily B
Emily B 25 gün önce
Not sure the theory fits the higher autoimmunity rates in western cultures where women are far freer to look after own needs compared to some other regions with more traditional cultures. The Hygiene hypothesis might fit better. But I do believe in some contribution from emotional state/stress in some cases.
Jasmine Glein
Jasmine Glein 3 aylar önce
Haha they do what they want and don't give shit what others think
mandance
mandance 29 gün önce
One point I disagree on, while I do agree trauma is a big component, I think Gabor is missing the mart by not acknowledging how the food supply has heavily been degraded over time and full of chemicals, I don’t think all this chronic disease is only emotional stuff, it’s not like traumas are higher now than in previous times.
Helen Ndow
Helen Ndow 3 aylar önce
I am addicted to Gabor Mate
Suzane Sugrue
Suzane Sugrue 3 aylar önce
Here, Here
Zenobi Powell
Zenobi Powell 3 aylar önce
Me toooooo 😍
New Cures781
New Cures781 2 aylar önce
He’s skewed in his view of women being the ones most suppressing things. My guess is that this has more to do with older women. Men seem to be suppressing quite a lot. Men also don’t live as long and have much higher rates of suicide. If a person commits suicide, they often don’t live long enough to slowly develop cancer...Everyone is suppressed to some, unhealthy extent.
Livon Diramerian
Livon Diramerian 3 aylar önce
You can't give what you don't have.
James McCarthy
James McCarthy 3 aylar önce
How do you process guilt when someone else was damaged by what you did & is still suffering the consequences of that? You feeling better or rationalising it doesn't help them.
Jordan Ferguson
Jordan Ferguson 2 aylar önce
Help them.
Steve Cooper
Steve Cooper 3 aylar önce
Here's a thought Why do we not perceive the mind and body as one entity?
Noboya Vedagarbha
Noboya Vedagarbha 22 gün önce
Do you constantly perceive that your lungs breathe air?
Aya
Aya 3 aylar önce
Because it is the false dichotomy we have been taught (Culturally etc.)
I am not Fabio
I am not Fabio 2 aylar önce
Gabor is awesome
Lisa V
Lisa V 2 aylar önce
Please..I blame myself for my 2 yr old daughters alopecia. Out of what I considered necessity moved my 3 children to my home state to keep them from abuse of my ex husband. Now I pray for a way to help her. I've never experienced this as a parent of 14yrs. It's only been a few months but how can I help her immune system stop attacking her hair follicles? Did I do this to her which doesn't even matter? Can I find a cure by simply appreciating her existence? I feel so helpless which also does not matter. This thing.. it's not her fault.
Lisa V
Lisa V 25 gün önce
@Emily B thank you. My Dr thinks it was her getting COVID that triggered her immune system months later. He started her on modére pure hoping for hair growth. Very kind and wise reply. I appreciate it. Afraid it might get worse cuz I'm about to go to battle with him in court. Hoping the judge sees my heart and concern in the situation.
Emily B
Emily B 25 gün önce
You didn't do it to her, that's victim blaming yourself, and you have taken her to safety too. Hopefully you can top up your own inner calm & that will have a positive effect on either her immunity or her way of coping x
MARY ANNE Stevenson
Real good sensible truth
Pippi Barbieri
Pippi Barbieri Aylar önce
Yea this is called wounded healer - attempting to help others in order to avoid yourself’s basic needs
Tatarevic23
Tatarevic23 3 aylar önce
I like Maté, and I am on board with most of the ideas and arguments. I do have a question though. There’s been a rising in autoimmune diseases, mostly in women. Maté explains this in part because women are the ones who take care of others, partners and family. However, hasnt this caring role for women declined in late modernity, with more freedom and less defined roles for the genders? Therefore, shouldn’t autoimmune disease prevalance among women have declined, if not at least not changed? Obviously, gender roles and expectations aren’t the only things that can cause suppression of emotions, but still.
Gogogo Lyra
Gogogo Lyra 2 aylar önce
Not only do women take care of their families, children etc., they take the added responsibility of working for 8hrs/day. And add to that high rates of domestic violence and divorce
Jordan Ferguson
Jordan Ferguson 2 aylar önce
@Tatarevic23 Sure, no worries! Thanks for taking the time to read it🍀
Tatarevic23
Tatarevic23 2 aylar önce
@Jordan Ferguson Thanks for your input :)
Jordan Ferguson
Jordan Ferguson 2 aylar önce
It really hasn't declined in my observations. They're expected to do the exact same, only now they have careers as well. I think a lot of women's problems would decline if they weren't so scared of being alone. That fear leads them to do absolutely anything and everything for social and male validation. I'd say work on self love, esteem, abandonment issues. Many even have kids without really thinking about it, they just do it because it's what everyone does, and they fear going against the grain because their self worth depends on external definitions and influences.
Clouds of wonder
Clouds of wonder 3 aylar önce
Learning to say No to my past Sociel and Sociely imposed ways of choosing to be a yes ppl pleasing and all that entails yes the mother roll is a reality that leads our female children and or male s to get stuck in robbing us of our humanity Awarness of ourselves is totally nessasary for our physical emotional mental health 🥁🥁🥁
NFTeve Interviews
NFTeve Interviews 4 aylar önce
hello, emotions are essential, but toxins, lifestyle and just the sugar and nonfood foods that we eat, are the other causes. Electronics, disconnection to the magnetic force of the earth with plastic soled shoes. For sure, I got sick from long-term trauma~but then I got well.
Clara Bell
Clara Bell 4 aylar önce
And this is why I cannot and will not ever accept people being labelled. How about plain old acceptance and compassion for fellow human beings, with no agenda. Bill Hicks said stop putting a price on everything, I say that includes a ‘label’ 🙏❤️
kathleen Wharton
kathleen Wharton 3 aylar önce
Jesus Keeps me Safe and Free And Gives me Love and Peace 😇 Believe Jesus!
Susan
Susan 4 aylar önce
Ought to explain anger vs rage as they are very different.
Alice Rose
Alice Rose 3 aylar önce
Only in degree. Rage may be the outcome of trying to suppress anger.
Tess Obenauf
Tess Obenauf 4 aylar önce
Dr. Gabor does this in a video with Tim Ferriss titled Dr. Gabor Mate - The Myth of Normal, Metabolizing Anger and Rage
Wulu
Wulu 4 aylar önce
Suppressed emotion..
Nobi
Nobi 3 aylar önce
I think women have been somewhat forced over the few last thousand years to be agreeable, I think more men are naturally more agreeable than women, but disagreeable men were more successful because of physical power, but now women can be as disagreeable as they want (which is not always a bad thing) and succeed by smarter and more cunning ways. The gender roles and the nuclear family structure and other traditional/religious roles of women are forcing them to be the caring and supporting ones despite their psychological nature being the opposite a lot of the time, especially at ages where you probably shouldn't be (adolescence and early adulthood) if you want to grow and actualize as an individual.
Kahlo Diego
Kahlo Diego 2 aylar önce
@S Illa The only approval they get is for being nurturing to others so they get involved in that without ever having been nurtured themselves.
S Illa
S Illa 2 aylar önce
And its so very sad...
Nobi
Nobi 2 aylar önce
@Kahlo Diego yes and thats a display of what I said, women are usually more disagreeable on average by nature.
Kahlo Diego
Kahlo Diego 2 aylar önce
Women bullying other women is sneaky, common and socially acceptable.
Nobi
Nobi 3 aylar önce
@NJGuy1973 Uhhhh changing society is not one of my goals lol, I just stated some observable facts thats it
Red76
Red76 Aylar önce
If yu actually stop & think about what he is saying it makes so much sense.
Zak Adams
Zak Adams 2 aylar önce
as a Man I am very feminine in the sense that I want to build for nurturing, I feel extreme rage and take it out on myself to grow and make the difference but its not working
Zak Adams
Zak Adams 2 aylar önce
I've tried so hard to build this, I made things but never found anyone that I could confide in. I truly want more than anyone I've met, its not vanity either, I don't know what to do
Zak Adams
Zak Adams 2 aylar önce
I want to be dominant but to raise the select group to be on that level or higher. I want to win together and feel mutual love
Zak Adams
Zak Adams 2 aylar önce
its so upsetting because the steps I take in any direction seemingly cut me out from what I desire
Circle of moon music
Circle of moon music 22 gün önce
So sad that so many people choose to worship Jordy Peterson over this guy.
Oliver Matias
Oliver Matias 10 gün önce
Thank you❤❤❤❤❤❤❤🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏☺️
a c
a c Aylar önce
Actually it's meant that much sooner than women. I think men are the big sacrifices between the two genders as we give up years of Our Lives support him and defending the other gender
AnjA
AnjA 3 aylar önce
Thank you!
April Nelly
April Nelly 3 aylar önce
I'm not certain that his supposition is correct, the past 80 years showing a rise in autoimmune deficiency in women runs parallel with feminism the rise of feminism the rise of individuation and having a career having multiple partners etc etc women are more unsupported by feminism than they were by the patriarchy
My Secret Life of Pain
Wow I totally disagree with all of this. I think the rise in diseases, especially those affecting women, have many explanations, besides women being “too nice.” I can’t believe that you two, of all people, would sit there and say “this is the only explanation for the rise in chronic illness in women!” 1. There have been incredibly unhealthy major lifestyle shifts affecting all genders since the industrial revolution. I grew up in a small city full of nature and I now live in the biggest metropolis in the country. All the new apartments are paving over every square inch of dirt. There are no common areas, no green areas, no trees, no gardens, no patios. No space for people to ever be outside, see some green, see the sky, feel the sunlight, chat with their neighbors. This goes on for blocks and blocks, many areas unsafe so people can’t even go for walks. It’s depressing and scary to walk in many neighborhoods. Concrete, trash, graffiti. We have already proven the negative health effects of living without trees and access to nature. Children growing up in these neighborhoods rarely experience anything else, and this how the majority of US citizens live. People now work from home in these crammed concrete shoeboxes without sunlight. Or they commute alone in their car on clogged freeways to sit alone in a cubicle staring at a screen all day, literally sealed off from access to outside. This is a completely sedentary lifestyle, an isolated lifestyle, a detached-from-nature lifestyle, and we know for a fact that all these things negatively impact all markers for all diseases (and Dr Mate knows this!!) Then for recreation, we sit and stare at more screens, engaging passively not actively, binging Netflix, scrolling through TikTok, playing increasingly immersive video games. Everything is physically isolated from other humans, everything is using a screen. This is the biggest change since the industrial revolution. Even in spite of it, only sixty years ago, humans were more connected to each other “IRL”. People actually gathered and participated in active hobbies, in social clubs, social dancing. Being part of a community religious organization was often compulsory, often with numerous social outlets throughout the week. I’m not saying religion is the answer, but it did bring people together and create IRL community and Dr Mate knows this has major benefits to all disease markers. 2. As to “but why women?”- it is well documented that women’s pain, and illnesses affecting women, have been and STILL ARE taken less seriously in western medicine. We are still dealing with total medical ignorance regarding aspects of female anatomy and the issues that affect those structures. Women were only required to be used in clinical trials starting in the 90s. Illnesses affecting women primarily are still demonstrably underfunded and under researched compared to those primarily affecting men. Maybe we are seeing a rise in diagnoses of “women’s diseases” because there are more women in medicine and in places of societal power, who are refusing to be dismissed for what they know are real conditions. 3. We are only now finding out a little bit how TESTOSTERONE affects pain perceptions and the immune system, and it’s already documented it plays a role in pain conditions like fibromyalgia. And yet despite testosterone being a normal part of the female hormone makeup, testosterone replacement is still only FDA approved for males, as if it’s presence in female bodies is a fluke, and it couldn’t possible serve any vital purpose for us. Medications such as the birth control pill are only now being called out for causing serious long term health issues in women, such as hormonally mediated vestibulodynia, caused by the suppression of testosterone in the ovaries and the increase in sex hormone binding globulin in the liver. Most gynecologists are still ignorant about this despite plentiful research. Think of how many women you know who have been prescribed the pill not just for contraception but for all manner of health issues, and none of us have been told of the effects it can have on healthy levels of needed sex hormones. 4. Aside from enormous lifestyle changes in an incredibly short span of human evolutionary history, and the documented ill-affects they have on health; aside from the historical and current medical apathy and ignorance towards specifically “women’s issues,” aside from the role of testosterone in pain-perception and chronic illness; a fourth contributor of rising rates of chronic illnesses, just off the top of my head, is obviously going to be environmental exposure to chemicals. C’mon. Every year, we have headlines about new chemicals making people sick that regulatory agencies responsible for protecting us somehow failed to catch. We are exposed to hazardous chemicals everywhere. There have been major changes to agricultural practices, pharmaceuticals, construction, manufacturing in our society, and the EPA is constantly being threatened by corporate interests trying to de-regulate known pollutants in our air and water. Flint, Michigan. Hinkley, California. We have known endocrine system disrupters in plastics that are extremely slow to biodegrade. We have dermatitis causing allergens used in pharmaceuticals, foods, and personal care products. We have ingredients that are banned in other countries around the world used in products for babies in the US. We’re still dealing with illnesses caused by exposure to BPA, phthalates (8 times the amount found in women’s urine than men’s), cadmium, formaldehyde, mercury, lead, asbestos, creosote, and other chemicals we now know are extremely toxic but are still poisoning us. Guess what? Environmental toxin exposure is a gender parity issue!! 80-90% of those affected by environmental toxins are WOMEN. toxic exposure affects women differently. Women use more personal care products than men. Women have more adipose tissue than men to store chemicals that bioaccumulate. Women are more likely to do most of the cleaning around the house, and more likely to work in a cleaning-related job. Ex.: Studies have found higher cancer rates among people who clean for a living, and for women in particular, invasive cervical cancer is five times more common in women who clean for a living than in other women. Unique hormonal balances and other biological differences contribute to women's toxin issues. Research done on animals has indicated that males are able to detoxify their own body five times more efficiently than females, and this inequality could potentially apply to humans as well. But guess which sex is much less likely to be studied when it comes to the adverse effects of environmental toxins? You guessed it. Females. So please, men, tell me some more about how women’s personalities are the ONLY explanation for why we have more chronic illness and autoimmune disease. If I didn’t like you both and the rest of the work you do, I’d call this unbelievable oversimplification of illness in women (veering dangerously close to labeling the causes of our illnesses “hysteria”) what it looks like to me: plain misogyny.
My Secret Life of Pain
@Camlam The statement I took issue with was a blanket statement, a generalization given without any reference to the real issues I’ve brought up. It would have been completely possible to throw in a sentence like “this explanation is in addition to factors such as hormonal differences, variation in exposure and processing of environmental toxins, and the real, documented gender bias in medicine.” Failing to take 15 seconds to say that in a video this long is not acceptable. Just look at the many people in the comments here who clearly believe the *only* and or primary difference in chronic illness rates between the sexes is solely based on emotions.
Camlam
Camlam 18 gün önce
@My Secret Life of Pain I am sorry you experienced that. I still don't think Gabor Mate is a party to that or that you are looking at his remarks in context. I don't have an agenda. I already stated my point above. I saw the whole discussion in context, and the point wasn't that women are to blame for being "too nice" and possibly hysterical. He was actually stating that women face a cultural bias, which is harmful to their health. I took it that you were making a similar point. Also, he has stated that his work is not a substitute for established medicine and that the physical aspect of health is not to be ignored. The fact that he was a doctor doesn't mean people shouldn't consult with their own doctors. What he talks about are the factors that aren't widely considered within western medicine. I think your concerns are valid, but they're "beyond the scope" of the discussion. He was giving cultural commentary, not professional advice.
My Secret Life of Pain
@Camlam As I have been personally affected by medical professionals with this attitude, I have every reason to take this seriously and defensively. What happened to me, losing a decade of my life to medical gaslighting, is not ok. My illnesses had physical, resolvable causes, including my autoimmune diseases. My scenario may also not be true in every case, but it is certainly a common scenario. I don't hear Dr. Mate acknowledging any of the valid points I have made about the many other causes of differences in rates of specific illness in males vs females. What's your agenda?
Camlam
Camlam 25 gün önce
He may not be right about everything, but he makes valid points. You are taking it too defensively and zeroing in on the comments about women having higher rates of diseases. In context, he was talking about diseases men get too, for the same reasons. The higher rates for women were attributed to the CULTURAL EXPECTATIONS that they should be accommodating and be caretakers. The cultural expectations on a man are largely in the workforce. If he has to leave the workforce due to illness, he has a better chance of focusing on his own recovery. A woman is still compelled to take of others in the home. This isn't true in every case, but it's a common scenario.
K Arnaud
K Arnaud 28 gün önce
Thanks for mentioning the elephant in the room. The professional and scientific ignorance of complex lifetime hormonal issues for women, including testosterone, is really woeful. And a lot of that seems to be from prejuduce or stigma or which is really beneath the intelligence of the professionals, they have to do better. Woman seem to be more complex physiological beings hormonally and possibly (to my uneducated thinking anyway), likely to be more affected by the massive increase in environmental endocrine disruptors that surround us, in ways we don't yet understand. I don't know, there is a lot of science out there to be done before we know the picture at the physical level. Obviously so much of what Dr Mate says about the psychology and spiritual dimension of stress related illness is spot on. Everyone of us has more to learn, science will give us a lot more (not everything!) on the physiological data, bring it on for knowledge about women, hormones and auto immune prevalance.
Maiwand Painda
Maiwand Painda 20 gün önce
I understand what he is saying but what if my authentic self is not grounded, and can’t be calm when I am authentic?
Sue
Sue 3 aylar önce
We need to stop eating suffering animals for one thing, what happens to them is shockingingly cruel
Carol Pessin
Carol Pessin 3 aylar önce
Thank you very much
Join Coffee
Join Coffee 3 aylar önce
You are so kind towards women. What a contrast with Jordan perterson .
Join Coffee
Join Coffee 2 aylar önce
@Lewis Bracken nah, I’ve watched many of his videos, it is a theme that he wants to control, suppress and use women as objects for men’s benefit.
Lewis Bracken
Lewis Bracken 2 aylar önce
Spoken like someone who has only watched cherry picked out-of-context snippets of Peterson 🤣
Gogogo Lyra
Gogogo Lyra 2 aylar önce
Gabor is a physician. When u encounter people suffering frm disease u learn to be compassionate.
Tara S
Tara S Aylar önce
Another factor that has an effect on the creation of Diabetes 2 is WHAT we are eating and WHEN during the day.
Mike Ose
Mike Ose 3 aylar önce
Once again I want to thank #Drosereaaron on TRvid for helping me get rid of my PCOS
Concepción Jiménez
No entiendo todo .... Podrian traducirlo porfavor !......creo q me pierdo cosas muy valiosas.. Gracias
Sinéad Walsh
Sinéad Walsh 2 aylar önce
I have that jug! I use it as a decanter 🤣
Keira Huber
Keira Huber 21 gün önce
😄
Stephanie Eno
Stephanie Eno 3 aylar önce
I feel lien that going to happe to me for mothers being negative to me I own my South for getting involved with negativity they were just good sales people
Saida
Saida 2 aylar önce
That’s exactly my case
Miriam .Varga
Miriam .Varga 2 aylar önce
Hi I am having trouble hearing this talk as I have a hearing loss. If you leave the captioning function when you record it, I would be able to access it. Can you please consider making sure the caption function is on when making any new TRvid videos thank you.
WHEREMY LIFEGO
WHEREMY LIFEGO 2 aylar önce
Where is part 1 & 2 please
Lindsay
Lindsay 3 aylar önce
Huh? How is the vast rise in toxicity in the 20th century NOT the obvious culprit for huge rise autoimmune disorders?
Knowledge Berakah
Knowledge Berakah 5 gün önce
I had a stroke from that n anger! After having a stroke i cut alot of people my life 2022.
vas mirza
vas mirza Aylar önce
thyroid issues too.
Ita Graiser
Ita Graiser 2 aylar önce
I feel that I need more guide lines .it is all true but what do you do with it
ann marie Fuller
ann marie Fuller 19 gün önce
But what exactly are our needs??
Saida
Saida 2 aylar önce
I can’t find or go back to my authentic me. I feel lost, uncertain, helpless
Sarojani Doddapaneni
Sarojani Doddapaneni 3 aylar önce
Dr GABER MATE Domination Lack of Respect and Responsibility to the Fellow human being in family members of society and the institutions and honesty not hypocrisy
tippi maravala
tippi maravala 3 aylar önce
Thanks
Jarka Chalmovianska
Jarka Chalmovianska 3 aylar önce
Multiple sclerosis- how is it possible that the number of women 3x when women were always taught to be the givers, caregivers, homemakers, nurterers, its not a thing of the past decade. In the past it might have been even harsher. 10 kids, work on field, cooking, cleaning, pleasing man... now its the same just only 1-2 kids, but full time job, at home second shift...???
yvonne shanson
yvonne shanson 3 aylar önce
@RH exactly!.. and the nature of work also plays a part, women are required to dedicate a big amount of brain and energy, in very competitive and women unfriendly environments, draining their emotional resources...
RH
RH 3 aylar önce
Esther Perel has addressed this. Before, there was a VERY strong community which already helped ANY woman who had a child Now, the woman is alone with severe judgement from all sectors of society. It is NOT the same, by any means.
Question Everything
Question Everything 3 aylar önce
Most of the more severe illnesses happen to people by an upsetting event happening in their lives that takes them by surprise, unexpectedly, impacting first in the brain, then in the corresponding organ which that part of the brain controls. The end of WWI had absolutely everything to do with the Flu and lung TB outbreak that occurred killing millions. In nature, the biological conflict linked with a territorial fear (just what it means-a fear in your territory, your home, your community, etc.) is a widening of the bronchia (tissue loss). Your body attempts to widen your bronchia in order to allow more air into your lungs to give you more strength and energy to fight to keep your territory safe. Stay with me.......The biological conflict linked with a death fright impacts the lungs. The lungs attempt to grow larger in order to allow more air in because breath equals life, as we all know. No breath equals death. Why are so many people across the world suddenly having their appendix removed? The appendix is associated with “being in fear for one’s life”. The HEALING phase is the rupture/inflammation. While you are in the fear or death fright conflict, you notice no symptoms of “disease”, except you have cold hands, cold feet, you can’t sleep, you awaken at 3 AM every night, you have little appetite. During the war, millions of people were in fear of the bombing of their homes and cities where the war was most active. Fearing for their lives, their loved ones in the war, their ability to survive. The food in the stores was sparse due to shortages. This lasted for 4 long years! The longer the conflict, the worse the healing phase. Within 2 weeks of the German Chancellor announcing the end of WWI, these millions of people ALL went into the healing phase all at the same time. It is during the healing phase that you experience symptoms of illness! What is the healing phase of the bronchia widening? Severe bronchitis, pneumonia. The body attempts to refill this lost tissue and you experience inflammation, fever, coughing, body aches, fatigue, etc. What is the healing phase of the extra lung tissue that grew? Decomposing of the tissue by TB bacteria and fungi. The symptoms of this healing phase are: severe coughing up of blood and tissue, fever, inflammation, severe mucous, body aches, fatigue. During this decomposing of the extra tissue (tumor), the body expels a lot of protein, and without replenishment, severe protein loss can result in death. Antibiotics did not exist yet. If TB bacteria does not exist in a person or they have been vaccinated against TB (big mistake), then the tumor will simply encapsulate and become dormant and not harm you. Who died during the Spanish Flu? Mainly the poor who could not afford to buy meat and proper nourishment, and the people who were directly impacted by the bombings and destruction of their homes. Millions of people suffered fear and death frights during the fighting of WWI, and millions of people all went into healing at the end of it. Not everyone was affected because not everyone suffered the same way. It’s not a “flu”, it’s not something you “catch”. It’s biological, meaningful, and unavoidable. One hundred years later, a Fear Campaign begins, using the media to spread it......
dirga mahardika
dirga mahardika 2 aylar önce
But stoic says control your emotion.
K S
K S 2 aylar önce
He looks so tired. He sounds drowsy as if he’s heavily medicated.
Sonraki
Gabor Maté - The Roots of Healing
1:07:55
Authenticity
35:52
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